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[26 Sep 2009|12:55pm] |
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tiger army |
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Everything is changing, and for the first time ever I feel like I can handle it, and that I am ready for it.
BRING IT ON!
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| Oh man! |
[09 May 2009|02:54pm] |
Ugh. Sunshine might have Lyme disease. I just have to wait for the vet to call me and tell me her test results. Fortunately it's easily cured with antibiotics. I just hate being in suspense. She got the blood test on Wednesday, and the vet still hasn't called. :[ I also have to get a cavity filled on Monday. It's my first ever cavity, and I'm sort of nervous. Maybe I can just play up the whole "I'm in pain" thing and get some vicodin out of it. Oh yeah, and at the end of the month I'm going to Florida to see my Dad. I'm super stoked. I'm ready to hit the beach. I went skiing yesterday, I guess it still seems kind of wrong that it only gets up to 55 degrees here in May. And that it's still snowing. I'm ready for it to be summer already!
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| My dog... |
[18 Dec 2008|06:04pm] |
Yup, so for those of you who don't know, I adopted the most adorable dog about 2 months ago. Her name is Sunshine. :D

She looks a bit high...

And this is just too cute. :]
I really just wanted to show her off. Hahaha.
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[07 Nov 2008|08:08pm] |
I feel like I've been so busy lately.
but i think this is the happiest i've been in my entire life.
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| chillin, killin, you know ho i rollllll |
[11 Sep 2008|10:30pm] |
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hopeful |
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i feel better
even though i have a shitty job, it pays, and i can pay rent. after we get a roommate we may get a puppy! :D winter is just around the corner, and i CAN'T WAIT!!
i'm stoked for the future.
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[13 Aug 2008|09:58pm] |
this is what i do. i get drunk. i fuck things up.
shawn doesn't want to talk to me anymore cause i was an asshole to him last night. i'm pretty sure all his friends hate me.
and all because i'm a stupid drink bitch who can't keep their shit together.
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[10 Aug 2008|01:44pm] |
i've been crying myself to sleep for more than a week.
even though i didn't know them that well.
i just can't comprehend the fact that emily's freckly face and austin's sarcastic comments are GONE. i went for a job interveiw at eddie bauer and sande kept saying one of their associates was injured in a car crash and i nearly stared crying in her office.
i keep thinking about the butterfly effect and maybe if i had never gone to her house on four twenty, or never punched him in the arm as a joke then they might be somewhere else, or they might never have started driving. i don't know what to think. about if what you do in life echos in death. or where you go when you die. or why it was them.
because you always read about some guy dying in a car crash, and you always say "oh that's terrible," and you hear the statistics about the teens that die in car crashes every day and you never really think about it until it happens to be some one you know.
i saw a car insurance commecial with a car crash and i stared crying. just broke down on the couch, as i was watching tv so i couldn't think.
i will be happy one minute and then i will have a lump that feels like a golf ball in my throat and my eyes will start burning, but i don't want to make a scene on the bus so i put my sunglasses on and thank god that then next stop is mine, and i just hope and hope and hope that no one gets off with me so i can walk home crying quitetly.
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[05 Aug 2008|01:23pm] |
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i think things are going to get alot better pretty soon.
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[26 Jul 2008|03:35pm] |
last night was pretty weird.
still so many questions about it.
like how did we get home?
at what point in the night did i go to eriks house?
oooorgh.
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[11 Jul 2008|01:18pm] |
i do this every time.
i find someone that makes me happy. i do something stupid. and then i end up the only one getting hurt.
fuck him.
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| I am finally seeing that I was the one worth leaving! |
[12 May 2008|02:44pm] |
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i can't believe hes already gone. this is already over. he is gone. and i don't know when i'll see him next. and i'm breaking down every time i think about the fact that the days of waking up next to him are OVER. no more good morning, beautiful. and we will have only eachother's voices through static air, or texts at odd hours. no more, "i love you, sleeping beauty," while he's at work or waiting for him to come home or any of that. i do not want to lose it, but i let go, and its gone.
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[08 May 2008|11:34am] |
i am done with finals. and school.
my mom is picking me up saturday.
this whole thing is so bittersweet. i'm glad to finally get the fuck outta here.
but not looking forward to leaving him.
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[04 May 2008|03:58pm] |
you finally told him what you wanted to say,
and now it will all be gone in two weeks.
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[03 May 2008|06:35pm] |
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ohshit!
just over 2 weeks until i am in colorado.
i am definitely not going to miss san angelo, and i'll only miss the people in galveston.
but i'm going to miss shawn a whole lot.
a whole whole lot.
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[30 Apr 2008|05:21pm] |
2.5 weeks until colorado.
jhsezifugnasilrvaiugf
can't wait! :D
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[29 Apr 2008|04:56pm] |
and then after months and months of waiting, anticipating, my parents shake my logic. plant the seed of doubt.
my heart is screaming for me to leave in three weeks, my mind, telling me to wait just a few more months.
and put up with my parents for another summer? i don't know if i can handle that.
i don't know. i don't know about anything anymore.
Fuck that shit. I'm going to go to Colorado in three weeks
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[28 Apr 2008|11:26pm] |
i got a new swimsuit today!
:D
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| honesty won't get you far! |
[25 Apr 2008|01:44pm] |
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mood |
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aggravated |
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music |
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circa survive |
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so i guess the word about me got out. lots of galveston kids are not wanting to associate with me anymore.
oh well. fuck them. fuck galveston. fuck texas.
i'll be gone in a few weeks. i can start new. i don't want to deal with them anymore, anyway.
i'll be out of contact, i'll be gone, i'll be someone new.
i'll just start new.
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[23 Apr 2008|11:32pm] |
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so i just saw an add on the side of my screen that said: "LET'S TALK COLORADO"
i'm all ears.
:D
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[11 Apr 2008|07:22pm] |
I want to keep this:
making out on the living room floor, and when his phone goes off in his pocket, he grinds his thigh into my cunt until whoever was calling hangs up. then, sets the phone alarm on vibrate to detonate unexpectedly in two minutes
I want to keep this:
Driving in his car and Him making me smile the whole way to Hobby Lobby And back, Sneaking up behind me, And him playing his guitar all crazy and then playing something soft and slow and not being embarrassed to show him what i call my "poetry"
I want to keep this, but I know it won't happen. May 9, and it's over, gone, done. And I will be running to Colorado. I had my escape before this ever happened! And he's already saying he wants to visit me, and will I still talk to him? Yes, yes fuck yes I will! How could I not?!
((His name is Shawn, and he thinks I'm pretty!))
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